NEW BEGINNINGS....Day Five

January 5th....’NEW BEGINNINGS’...Day Five

Yesterday I wrote about eight things that to quit this year.  It came from something I read on social media.  I mentioned I’d take the next eight days to focus one of them one each day.  The first thing on the list was ‘trying to please everyone’.  

Why is it we want to make sure everyone is pleased with us?  Is it because we want them to love or like us?  Do we want to please them so they are happy?  Do we try to please everyone to make ourself feel better?  Do we actually feel better when we try hard as we can to please everyone? Will they like us less if we don’t try hard to make them happy? 

These questions tumble around in my mind at the moment like clothes in a dryer.  I wonder if people expect too much from me.  Over the years I have tried to make everyone happy.  I’d go out if my way to do nice things.  I’ve kept a civil tongue when I know I shouldn’t.  All in all it seems trying to please everyone was a chore.  It was not the real me and I seemed to let people walk all over me in the long run.  I went out of my for years as not to offend anyone; not let them down when they needed something; and at times I had been giving up on my own plans to accommodate others.  I realized that I was being a doormat trying to please everyone.  I put others first and myself second.  Never did I receive the same from them.  This year it’s all going to change. I’m going to be myself.  There’s a song with the words that say something about if you can’t please everyone then you got to please yourself. Well it’s hard to please everyone all the time.  You need to put yourself first.  If you aren’t pleased, then how can you please others.  This year I’m putting my foot down. I am putting myself and family first. Everyone will be second.  If I can be there when needed yes I’ll be there. No more rearranging my life for others who never did the same for me. You’ll find trying not to please everyone will show you just who your real friends are.  Don’t hide your true self.  Don’t bite your tongue.  Let the real you show.  Think about those (if any) who went out of their way to please you time and time again. 

Yes, I did it already.  I refused to change already made plans because of someone thought their needs more important.  This was not a life and death issue for them. Anyone could have helped them out.  I was asked because I always been there when they asked.  We’re they pleased with my answer of NO; of course not.  I felt like a weight was taken off me.  Now I need to continue my not trying to be a pleaser to the masses.  This does not mean I won’t be available when someone needs me but I will review their request first; weigh options; see if I am available at the moment. If it’s a dire situation yes I’ll go out of my way.  

Think about your own situations and how you tried hard to please everyone.  Make this one of your goals to quit trying to please everyone and see if you aren’t a bit more happier. 

Until tomorrow....have a wonderful Sunday.